Holy Buck, Fatman!

Since I profiled the economic proposals of the top three Dems, It’s only fair that I do the same for the red side of the carpet.

Boy is it dismal. Words simply cannot explain the crap that is coming from these fartknockers.

First and foremost, when you click on the “issues” link on each one of their websites, the issue of the Economy is WAY BELOW “Keeping America Safe” rhetoric. What does this tell me? They all believe the biggest issue confronting them is the evil boogie man: terrorism. The Economy has just RECENTLY gained importance and only because a record number of Americans are facing foreclosure which is ultimately destroying their portfolios. That can’t happen, dammit.

It’s virtually impossible for me to highlight anything good about the Republican plans for the US Economy. It’s all the same shit the Bush Administration gave us, just wrapped up in a neato new package!  Free market this, Tax cuts that, ownership society, social security needs to be priviatized—BLAH BLAH BLAH.

What I WILL do is highlight the absurdity of the importance of the issues. believe me, this is fucking hilarious.    It will also demonstrate how detached they really are from the everyday economic issues of the common middle class family.  In order of…well…I don’t like any of them so I’ll order it on who currently has the most delegates. Afterwards, I’ll tell you the order of  issues on the website of the Contending em front runner.  After I reach an economic issue, I will stop listing them.  Recent additions regarding the “Stimulus Plan” are NOT included.

Mittens:

His issues page mentions Jihad, Nuclear and Tyrants right at the top, suggesting that the greatest threats aren’t the fact that most Americans haven’t seen a friken raise in a long time, but some perceived dictators overseas.

In layout order:

Keeping Americans Safe at Home and Abroad

Confronting Radical Jihad

Combating Nuclear Terrorism

Strengthening Latin American Allies and Confronting Tyrants

Winning the Global Economic Competition

Clinton places Strengthening the Middle Class as her number one issue.

McCain:

Okay–Disclaimer here: McCain DOES address the Economy as the first issue in the form of a “Tax Cut Plan” Typical. Tax cuts DO NOT WORK! McCain, by far, may appeal to the moderate dem who is disheartened by the current front runner.

Obama’s list of issues:  Civil Rights, Disabilities, Economy.

HuckleFucklebee:

This is, by far, the most disturbing. Luckily, the Evangelicals who believe he will bring on the second coming are showing that their group doesn’t encompass most of the GOP base. Knock on wood.

The Secure America Plan

Immigration

Faith and Politics

Sanctity of Life

Veterans’ Bill Of Rights

Education And The Arts

Health Care

Taxes/Economy

To be fair, he does address health care and keeps “marriage” after addressing the economy. Still…can he get anymore wacky????

John Edwards:

John Edwards lists the economy first under

Standing Up For Regular Families

So now that I have painstakingly shown you the utter disconnect of the Republican front runners, tell me your thoughts on these fuck knuckles.

Good LORD—No pun intended but Huckabee is one crazy wingnut. Crazy to point that it’s starting to scare the living shit out of me.

This crazy mofo was actually advocating revising the constitution to reflect “God’s Standards”. Uh…Here–Read for yourself:

“I have opponents in this race who do not want to change the Constitution,” Huckabee told a Michigan audience on Monday. “But I believe it’s a lot easier to change the Constitution than it would be to change the word of the living god. And that’s what we need to do — to amend the Constitution so it’s in God’s standards rather than try to change God’s standards so it lines up with some contemporary view.”

Allllrighty then.

I’m sure my fine readers have figured out that while I don’t profess to any faith, I do not stop anyone from worshipping. I believe that is what the first settlers were escaping when they came over to settle here in the first place. Correct me if I’m wrong, but would Fuckabee be negating the last 450 of US history? Oh, That’s right—Christians like him try to revise American History to fit their dominionist viewpoints.

Fundies like him give my Christian friends a very bad name. Not one of my christian friends have ever tried to forcefully convert me or even tell me I am going to hell because I don’t believe. In fact, we engage in healthy debate about all kinds of ideas from all sorts of faiths.  It’s what I believe America is all about–a healthy exchange of ideas, faiths and experiences that translates into the human experience.

What WOULD happen if Fuckabee got his way? Would I be mandated to join a church? Would Tithing be taken out of paycheck and forwarded to my mandated place of worship? It seems a bit outlandish, but rhetoric like his quote above leads me to believe that he would like to make changes that would essentially demonize people like myself and shame us into joining the mainstream of fundie thought in order to avoid persecution. While drastic changes won’t occur right away, the national discourse will start to sound like this:

It is as if they are intent on establishing a new religion in America – the religion of secularism. They are wrong.

That was Mitt Romney’s attempt at pandering to the Fundies who kinda find his religion..”Cultish”. In order to even try and bridge that gap, he needed to figure out who they could agree the bad guy was. Those Damn Secularist!  You know, the ones who chose NOT to worship anyone? Yep—that would be me.

I’m pretty sure I live a decent lifestyle. I’m married, raise a child who choses to follow a faith, I follow the law, help my fellow neighbor in need and don’t bother to stop anyone from worshiping whomever they want. Why am I a bad person? why do these fuckwads insist that my choices in life are “wrong”? Why do they wish to force their belief system on me when I am not bothering anyone? HUH?

The constitution doesn’t mean that I have the right to stop anyone from worshiping who they want. It also doesn’t mean that I should be forced to worship something I don’t believe in, either.  Freedom of religion—that means I am free to chose no religion at all. Fuckabee can take his God’s standards bullshit and shove it up his preacher ass.

clinch the Nomination. While I would like Billy boy back in the WH, I just can’t get behind HRC.  I also believe that HRC getting the Nomination will effectively bring out EVERY WINGNUT imaginable and leave us stuck with the horror that is Huckabee. and Nothing—NOTHING could be worse than that fucking crazy bastard nutball.  I honestly believe he will send out
“The Delta Force” to liberate Iran. Think about it…seriously. Uuuuhg.

Wingnuts always invoke that argument when talking about the evil “Clenis” (That’s Bill Clinton’s Penis, Circa 1997/98 for those who don’t know political slang)  They cry about not caring about the act of the Blow Job, but the act of lying under oath.

Fast Forward to  2007 and we are faced with this “Scooter” Libby idiot who was CONVICTED of obstruction of justice and other crimes. He gets handed a sentence befitting of the crime and what does Chimpy McFlysuit do? he Fucking COMMUTES THE FUCKING SENTENCE!

The guy was found guilty of lying, then COVERING IT UP. However, to a wingnut, that is okay. If you are rich and connected, it’s perfectly okay for you to do whatever you want! They can do anything because, as digby so eloquently says, they are so, so special.

From now on, if any fucking wingnut invokes the “Clenis” I will scream. Scream, folks. SCREAM.

A major thing happened yesterday. REALLY MAJOR.

It wasn’t about VT or American Idol. It certainly wasn’t about Anna Nicole Smith, Madonna or Angliena Jolie.
It was the first step to overturning Roe v. Wade.

There has been a lot of buzz about the recent Supreme Court ruling upholding the ban on what the right calls “Partial Birth Abortions” Of Course, that is not an actual medical term. The proper term for the procedure is “Intact Dilatation and Extraction” and contrary to the  Christian Nationalist rhetoric, the procedure is not performed unless there is a real medical necessity.

The Bush Administration has a plan. Bush and his Christian Base want desperately to outlaw abortion but it will be impossible to simply legislate it out of existence.  I firmly believe there is  a plan to effectively overturn Roe v Wade that is  well thought out by numerous think tanks and political operatives. It will not happen overnight. It will happen slowly while the average American is not looking.

The ultra religious right want to send a message to American women: KNOW YOUR PLACE. Submit to your husband and take care of your children because that is what the bible says. Men are the breadwinners and women are the caregivers. Which means they must take care of the man the way he is supposed to. If a women has the audacity to make a decision about her body without the counsel of her husband and God, then she is a sinner. The religious right will make sure that everyone will come to the flock–even if they have to legislate laws to get people to see the Truth.

It’s about control of the non-believers. It doesn’t matter what you actually think when you are confronted with an unwanted pregnancy or faced with a serious medical issue that could effect your life. The life of the unborn child is more precious. The life of the unborn child is what matters most.

Which brings me to my next grievance. Why is it that adoption for an american couple so difficult and expensive? Why is it that judges have ruled in favor of greedy birth parents and ordered adopted children to return to a mother who is barely able to take care of herself, let alone the child.

I have friend who wants to start having children with his wife. When they went to the Dr. they were told that it would be difficult because she had a condition. I asked him if he was going to consider adoption. He said they wouldn’t be eligible because they simply didn’t have enough money.  They would be deemed unable to economically care for a child because of a bout of debt due to hospitalization without healthcare. In short–they were a middle class couple denied the right to adoption because of red tape and money.

So, why isn’t the religious right working to make adoption a viable option for more people? Why isn’t there any discussion on reforming adoption laws to make it an attractive option to a women in need of assistance?

Because it is about control. Control of unbelievers for whom they believe they have dominion over.

last evening, I was a bit tired and decided to retire to the bedroom early in the evening. Instead of watching the usual South Park or Futurama, I flipped to the History Channel’s “A History of Sex”

The name was interesting enough and the chapter was on the Libertine movement through the Victorian era. I decided to watch. It is interesting how widespread sexual liberation always seems to give way to sexual repression in the name of morality. However, I never quite understood the roots of sexual repression. I can only surmise that it is the usual culprit, organized religion.

This prompted me to think about the book I’m currently reading entitled “Kingdom Coming: The Rise of Christian Nationalism” By Michelle Goldberg. The chapter on Abstinence only programs disturbed me. Michelle interviewed two people who head abstinence only programs. Pam Stenzel who was quoted at a particularly interesting debate as calling sex “A dirty, rotten, filthy, stinking sin!” (pg 135 of Kingdom Coming) Essentially, this lady scares teens into forced celibacy. Excellent! Tell a young impressionable teenager that, not only is sex bad, filthy, dirty and an evil sin and you’ll go to hell for engaging in it. Hello 17 century Puritan community! Someone needs to tell this lady that abstinence has proven time and again to fail.

Oh, and someone needs to get her a vibrator.

The other woman, Leslee Unruh runs the “Abstinence Clearinghouse” which celebrates abstinence until marriage. Instead of scaring young women into abstinence, this program celebrates the old adage, “wait until marriage”. According to Goldberg’s book, Unruh promotes the fairy tale marriage solution. Marriage is the only gateway to proper sexual behavior, much like the thinking during the Victorian era. The website even sells “purity rings” and “No trespassing underwear” to aid folks with their decisions to wait. Except that divorce rates among conservative Christians tend to be higher. I guess that no one bothered to tell them that healthy and responsible sexual attitude can lead to a happy and fulfilled marriage, eh?

As the parent of a teen girl, I’m going to tell you right now that all this abstinence crap is bullshit. 100% bullshit. What I do know is that my child will eventually engage in sexual behavior. The feelings she will experience are not filthy or sinful. They are a part of normal behavior. It also needs to be understood that with these feelings come responsibility. It’s my responsibility to make sure that she understands the responsibility fully.

In my opinion, sex is a part of human nature. If it was meant to be bad, it wouldn’t feel so damn good. Why try and repress something that should be celebrated as a part of living life? Sex is necessary to create life so it is made to feel good so we will want to keep doing it over and over. and over. and again. and again. and if he isn’t around , well..we can simply diddle ourselves. Because our arms are long enough to reach our goodies, which is  proof that masturbation isn’t supposed to be discouraged, either.

Some people may choose on their own to wait for a very special person. More power to them if they can. However, a majority of people will probably engage in premarital sex. It’s time to start realizing that repression breeds curiosity and ignorance only creates problems.

There has been a lot of opposition to requiring the HPV Vaccine to young girls. Most of the opposition has been from social conservatives concerned that…OMG…Teenagers might have…*GASP* SEX!!!!

You know what? I don’t think it should be mandatory. In fact, I think it should be left up to the parents to make such a decision.

And that is how we will weed out all the idiot neo cons concerned with teen sex rather then the health and safety of their children.

You see, My daughter WILL be getting that vaccine in June. I don’t think that she is going to go right out and start having sex, either. However, when that day comes, I’ll be able to sleep better knowing that she has just one more layer of protection from a deadly, painful cancer.

If the Neo con idiot believes that giving her daughter the shot will encourage her to have sex then she obviously doesn’t take the time to understand her child. Because the social conservative parents believe that keeping teens in the dark about what humans naturally engage in, they should be prepared to face all the repercussions of those decisions. If their teens are ill informed and catch deadly STDS….well…not my  problem. Should have made a better decision to inform your  children about sex, protection, healthy decisions and safe practices.

Does that sound a little mean? Most would argue that the child is the one that suffers the most when they make poor choices. What do you think would happen to the child of a ultra conservative who engaged in sexual intercourse before marriage? Could that teenager tell her parents that she contracted an STD? Probably not. She probably couldn’t even bring herself to tell her parents that she has symptoms “down there” our of fear.  However, I’ve realized that there isn’t anything people can do or say to change the minds of some ultra neocon. At least, not right now. I, however, do have a responsibility as a parent and I choose to to inform. MAYBE…she might be smart enough to tell a friend what I tell her and hopefully, it will counter the bad decisions of some idiot parent.

and THAT is survival of the fittest.

….there is only a wingnut.

The Carpetbagger Report  shattered my comic view of Chuck Norris. I have fond memories of Chuck. My mom embraced all things Chuck when I was growing up, so I learned to view the guy as some bad ass delta force ninja bruce lee texas ranger with an attitude.  A cheesy actor playing the lead in many cheesy anti terrorism 80’s movies that just make you laugh. He is the  bad guy in “Way of the Dragon” against Bruce Lee. He led the way for many B actors such as Michael Dudikoff, leaving us with endless entertainment in the form of the “American Ninja” series. And of course, the very toungue in cheek Chuck Norris Facts.

I can’t laugh at Chuck anymore. I can only shake my head in utter pity. He no longer represents cheesy american b acting, but represents a nutty faction of neoconservative thought. I can’t even laugh at the Chuck Norris facts!

Of course, this is America and Chuck can say what he wants in a president. But Chuck forgets a few things, namely Separation of Chuch and State and quite possibly the entire Enlightenment period.  Oh Chuck…..we hardly knew ye…..

Despite the out of control crime rate in My awesome City of Baltimore, the new mayor has decided that the first order of business in the City is….Trash. Hmmm..Is she trying to apply the “Broken Window Theory” to our city? I think it’s going to take a bit more then cleaning up the litter to clean up the trash in the city.

The Zero Boss has proof that Wal-Mart knows NOTHING about Anime: It’s selling HENTAI and YAOI!!!!  Wal-Mart selling the stuff makes me snicker, though. They can’t sell a cosmo with too much clevage, but then can sell cartoon porn. haha.  Any hardcore anime fan knows that tenticle boy love sex is a huge fucking joke. Yaoi fans, flame away.
Joan of Snark writes about how celebs are jumping the Hiliary Boat for the Obama Life jacket. Oprah, whose legions of housewife minions would die for her if she asked might make an appearance. Joan writes,

Let’s face it, if Queen Oprah throws her considerable weight (and no, that’s not a fat joke) behind Obama, I would say that Hillary (and everyone else) can just go home. I have some serious opinions (not necessarily favorable) about Dame Oprah, but I won’t get into that now. It’s her minions (not millions) that will sew up this election for Obama.

And she couldn’t be more correct.   Oprah encouraged millions of Housewives to read more then just trashy romance novels. If she mentions Obama in a positive way once, we can bet our asses we’ll be addressing him as “Mr.President” in ‘08.

Evil bender highlights a few HOLY CRAPS! First, this asshole who has a lovely collection of Blogs for choice. Presumably for all the other anti-choice minions to comment spam on. However, not every blog has an entry on choice. AND–the photoshopped dead “fetus” photos are a hoot.

The funniest part of that is my choice blog  is NOT included. I wonder why? because I CHOOSE to actually HAVE the child? I *STILL* had a choice dumbass and i’m STILL advocating CHOICE! It’s funny, too…a Commenter pointed out that advocating smoking (as he does in his header) kinda kills kids, too….
And this one—Total HOLY CRAP!  You have to see it for yourself.

Have a Good weekend, folks. It’s beer O’ Clock. I fully intend on cracking one on the train, too. Fuck Fox News and its “investigations”

Rep. Keith Ellison took his oath over a religious text today. Despite Rep Virgil Goode calling the act of taking the oath over the Quran a “Threat to American Values”, rep Ellison decided to give Rep. Goode a nice fat American finger. By using the Quran of Thomas Jefferson.

A snippet of Goode’s statement indicates he believes he can read the minds of Americans:

“I believe that the overwhelming majority of voters in my district would prefer the use of the Bible,” the Virginia Republican told Fox News, and then went on to warn about what he regards as the dangers of Muslims immigrating to the United States and Muslims gaining elective office.

I don’t care what Keith Ellison takes his oath over. If he’s muslim, it should be the Quran. if he’s a damn scientologist, it should be Dianetics, right?

I wonder what Goode would say about that?